Bedroom Demos- Vol. 18

by Terry Scott Taylor

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about

This is EP number 18. To get in on the exclusive fun, visit me at patreon.com/terryscotttaylor

credits

released November 7, 2018

All vocals & instruments- Terry Scott Taylor
Mastered by Bruce Neher

license

all rights reserved

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Track Name: Startin' Monday - 2018
1. Startin' Monday
from the TST album "Avocado Faultline"
Words & Music by Terry Scott Taylor
©2000 Careers-BMG Music Publishing, Inc

Startin' Monday
I'm cleanin' the slate,
gonna quit smokin'
start losin' some weight
tell someone I'm sorry,
oh its gonna be great
Startin' Monday
Startin' Monday
I'll be cheatin' fate
Here, I've written it down,
I've circled the date
Right now is not good
but I'll charge out the gate
Startin' Monday
I know I've said it before,
but this time I'm determined
to be what I know I can be
Don't need a "how-to" book
or some do-gooders sermon
to change my own destiny
And Startin' Monday
I'll be playin' it straight,
choosing only the good things
to put on my plate
reversing the engine,
rewinding the tape
Startin' Monday
I'm well aware of the fact
I've got only a weekend
to get all my ducks in a row
I'll be workin' real hard
to get out of my system
a few wild oats left to sow
But Startin' Monday
there'll be no debate
I'll start readin' my Bible,
rise early, work late,
recycle, stay sober,
chose love over hate
Startin' Monday
Startin' Monday
fix all my mistakes
Startin' Monday
guitar and vocal: T.S. Taylor
Note:
This one seems to be one of my more popular numbers, especially among my own family members! It’s certain we aren’t the only ones to put off correcting varying degrees of personal destructive behavior by resolving to do so after the coming weekend. We all know of course what usually takes place when the dreaded Monday, alas, rolls around; resolve weakens, rationalizations and excuses abound, and the cycle is repeated. The listener will note that much of the narrator’s determination to change is directed at classic negative propensities; over-eating, smoking, etc. but there are hints of deeper inner conflicts: “tell someone I’m sorry,” and “choose love over hate” clue us in that there may be more here beneath the surface. Our protagonist also states, rather disdainfully, that he’s not going to let any “do-gooder” (preacher) tell him what to do. He can do it all by himself if he just has enough willpower to do so, suggestive of the spiritual battle that is at the heart of our behavioral struggles. Repentance is the theme of the song’s backstory which you, the listener, are free to fill in yourself. Perhaps with your own.
The song version you have here is a recreation of the song’s original incarnation.
Track Name: Oh Shenandoah
2. Oh Shenandoah
(Traditional American folk song)

Oh Shenandoah
I long to see you
Away, you rolling river
Oh Shenandoah
I long to see you
Away, I’m bound away
‘Cross the wide Missouri

Oh Shenandoah
I love your daughter
Away, you rolling river
For her I’d cross your water
Away, I’m bound away
‘Cross the wide Missouri

’Tis seven long years
Since last I’ve seen you
Away, you rolling river
’Tis seven long years
Since last I’ve seen you
Away, I’m bound away
‘Cross the wide Missouri

Oh Shenandoah
I long to hear you
Far away, you rolling river
Oh Shenandoah
Just to be near you
Far away, far away
‘Cross the wide Missouri
I long to see you
Oh Shenandoah
I long to see you

Arrangement, vocal, and guitar: T.S. Taylor

Note:
Since first hearing and singing “Oh Shenandoah” in elementary school I’ve been in love with this classic traditional American folk song. The German’s have a perfect word for what hearing this song always evokes in me; Sehnsucht, a word for longing, yearning, and pining. The word has been used to describe a spiritual yearning for God Himself. C.S. Lewis said that reading the Norse Myths produced this same haunting effect in him, conjuring up in his imagination the vastness of the Northern regions. More traditionally, Sehnsucht describes the intensity of missing someone or someplace or, like with Lewis, express a longing for a far off place. While “Oh Shenandoah” originated with Canadian and American fur traders traveling down the Missouri River and had, by the mid 1800, became a sea chanty sung by sailors in various parts of the world, in my child’s imagination I always pictured a lone cowboy and his horse at dusk, high atop a ridge overlooking the vast valley and the river winding its way far below. I thought Shenandoah was a place he was pining to get back to even though the Shenandoah of the song is actually Chief Shenandoah of the Oneida tribe and the narrator of the song is a fur trader who wants to marry the chief’s daughter. Be that as it may, as a boy I could literally feel the intense yearning of the cowboy of my imagination who sang of his longing to return to the place he loved and had left so long ago. I’ve always wanted to record this song with The Lost Dogs but we never got around to it. Hopefully one day we will. Until then, I give you this simple, stripped down offering. May the Sehnsucht be with you!
Track Name: Pregnant Pause - 2018
3. Pregnant Pause
words and music: Terry Scott Taylor
From the DA album Mr. Buechner's Dream
©2001 Shape Of Air Music, BMI

Wonder if the water’s runnin’
Wonder if the well’s run dry
Wonder if the angels’ comin’
Wonder at the empty sky
It’s a miracle we ever had faith
Enough to have a laugh in that face
Here’s a pregnant pause
While we…
Wonder if the pipes are rusted
Wonder if the power’s down
Wonder if the circuit’s busted
Wonder if it’s holy ground
It’s a miracle we ever got saved
A wonder all our bills are paid
Here’s a pregnant pause
While we wonder if the devil’s laughing

It’s a miracle we ever had faith
Enough to have a laugh in that face
Here’s a pregnant pause
While we….
Wonder if the water’s runnin’
Wonder if the well’s run dry
Wonder if the angel’s comin’
Wonder at the empty sky
Wonder if the pipes are rusted
Wonder if the power’s down
Wonder if the circuit’s busted
Wonder if it’s holy ground
Wondering
Wonder if the devil's laughing
Wondering

instruments and vocals: T.S. Taylor

Note:
“Bible Stories” was the working title for what would eventually become Mr. Buechner’s Dream. I had envisioned the thematic contents of the lyrics to be similar in nature to those of “Eleanor (It’s Raining Now)”, a song I’d penned for the Lost Dogs, which merged a narrative of a modern relationship with that of Adam and Eve in the Genesis story. Bible Stories would do this same kind of thing only on a larger, more ambitious scale, but as the album grew ever wider in scope (eventually containing 33 songs!), and new subjects and possibilities presented themselves, my original concept was abandoned, though not completely. Pregnant Pause is among the handful of tunes originally conceived for Bible Stories. In it, like in Eleanor, I’ve merged the story of an average married couple struggling with the difficulties of life and faith, with the story of Sarah and Abraham; specifically the announcement by God that the aged Sarah would give birth to a son. The title Pregnant Pause itself is a play on words and hints at the idea that our modern couple is not only feeling the squeeze of financial and domestic burdens, but are anticipating even more financial pressures with the arrival of their formerly unexpected first child. Struggles with faith and doubt ensue, and a grand time is had by all!
I absolutely love the “punk country” raggedness of the original Daniel Amos’s recording. No point in trying to recreate that here. For this version I’ve slowed the tempo down slightly, smoothed the edges out a bit and added some background vocal variations and a few new bells and whistles along the way. While this version of Pregnant Pause retains much of the original’s eccentricity, I’ve given it a new coat of paint which I hope gives the listener a fresh environment in which to enjoy the song’s essential qualities.
Track Name: The Holes In The Hands
4. The Holes In The Hands
words and music: Terry Scott Taylor
©2018 Shape of Air Music, BMI

Now it’s possible to dream
Of everything
Washed and cleaned,
Being made well
The knife you drove in
Now only grazes my skin
Since I’ve already been
Through that hell
And your angry ghost
Sometimes rises and floats
Then comes here to gloat
And tap me on the shoulder
But I shrug it off, I say
“Why don’t you get lost”
This I’ve learned at the cost
Of growing older
When I’ve forgiven you,
I’m forgiven too
And I’m loving you
When I see you through…

The holes in the hands
That lift me up
That lift me up
When I see you through
The holes in the hands
That lift me up
That lift me up

I finally got wise
Still I wasn’t surprised
You’d worn a disguise
All along
Behind the mask were the flames
That left this raw terrain
Search among the remains
And you might find this song
When I’ve forgiven you,
I’m forgiven too
And I’m loving you
When I see you through….
The holes in the hands
That lift me up
That lift me up
When I see you through

The holes in the hands
That lift me up
That lift me up
When I see you through
The holes in the hands
That lift me up
That lift me up….
vocals and instruments: T.S. Taylor
Note:
The direct and easily understood words of Christ found in Matthew 6:15 are, or should be for all of us, profoundly sobering: “But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.” There have been a few people in my own life whose wounding behavior, not only of me but of others whom I love and cherish, has thrown up a significant impediment to my ability to truly forgive them. Thank God that sincere forgiveness is not dependent upon my or your own resources, but upon the Holy Spirit in us to truly bring it about and to continue to reveal to us any lingering resentments and thoughts of reprisal we may yet harbor. This is not the forum to examine just how forgiveness is specifically cashed out (Are we required to physically go to the person and tell them we forgive them and do so even if they haven’t asked for forgiveness or believe they’ve done anything wrong? Is simply forgiving them “in our hearts” sufficient? Do we forgive the person who has wronged us only when he or she asks us to forgive them?, etc. etc.) I can however say a little about what I believe forgiveness isn’t : to forgive doesn’t mean to blindly and wholeheartedly trust again. For instance, if you are financially ripped off by your business partner, you may sincerely come to forgive him but this doesn’t require you to then go right back into business with him. On the other hand in many instances, over time, trust can be built again in financial, matrimonial, and other kinds of relationships that have sadly gone south. Whatever the unique circumstances, nuances, and difficulties, it all begins with forgiveness.
“The Holes In the Hands” is my brief exploration of this topic. The line “The knife you drove in/now only grazes my skin” is a comment on how time often serves to alleviate the psychic pain inflicted by someone close us who has betrayed us in some form or fashion, even though we will continue to bear the scar of the initial wound. “And your angry ghost/sometimes rises and floats/then comes here to gloat/and tap me on the shoulder” references the power of a painful memory of lies and betrayal, however distant, to continue at times to haunt us. The chorus of the song offers an antidote to this aspect of human fallenness, the truth of which I grow more certain with each passing year.
T.S.T.
Track Name: Low Crawls & Hard Times - 2018
5. Low Crawls & High Times
Words and Music by Terry Taylor
©1994 Shape Of Air Music, BMI
from the DA album BibleLand

Blood, frogs, and feces (Won't somebody talk to me)
Rednecks and weak knees (Won't somebody talk to me)
Hemorrhoids and heartburn (Won't somebody talk to me)
Space cadets and earth worms (Won't somebody talk to me)
Love and understanding, right now
Every freak demanding, right now
Whining and commanding, right now
right now, right now...
Low crawls and high times (Won't somebody talk to me)
Skin heads and sex lines (Won't somebody talk to me)
Face lifts and action drinks (Won't somebody talk to me)
Spoiled sports and missing links (Won't somebody talk to me)
Love and understanding, right now
Every freak demanding, right now
Whining and commanding, right now right now, right now...
The Word becomes the flesh
My life becomes your death
But you'll be coming 'round the mountain soon
Cash cows and lucky dogs
Love birds and high hogs
Motor mouths and pip squeaks
Big shots and hood winks
Love and understanding, right now
Every freak demanding, right now
Whining and commanding, right now right now, right now...
Salvation at the gift shop
God is jumping at the I.H.O.P.
There's good news at eleven
Instant tea and instant heaven
Bad stands in good standing, right now
Here's to happy landings, right now
right now, right now...
But you'll be coming 'round the mountain soon
guitar and vocal: T.S. Taylor
Note:
The narrator of “Low Crawls And High Times” takes us through a series stream of consciousness laments about the generally bleak condition of the culture, and of humanity itself.
Thrown into the mix are grievances concerning naive and childish demands for quick fixes (…whining and commanding “right now!”), expressions of alienation (“Won’t somebody talk to me?”), Apocalyptic visions (“Blood, frogs and feces…”), and a protest against false feel-good pseudo “spirituality” which worships a kind of “genie in lamp" version of God (“ God is jumping at the IHOP”). Add in an apparently sincere yearning for the return of Christ to end the chaos and set things straight (“you’ll be comin’ round the mountain soon”), and basically what this guy is sayin' is…..well, kinda true and kinda messed up at the same time. I’ll admit he sounds a bit off his rocker….you know, like his elevator doesn’t go all the way to the….hey, wait, I wrote the song!
Among my fondest memories of Gene Eugene is the first time I played this tune for him on acoustic guitar in preparation for laying it down in the studio. When I got to the line “face lifts and action drinks”, Gene really started cracking up, obviously finding that line particularly funny. So many of the songs you guys are hearing here on Patreon are, for me, reminders of Gene. In them I can again see that impish face and hear that bright laughter.
Track Name: The World Next Door
6. The World Next Door
words and music: Terry Scott Taylor
©2018 Shape Of Air Music, BMI
More light is slowly seeping in
The dark can’t stop it anymore
The walls and doors are growing thin
Between us
And the World Next Door
Distant music, strange and sweet
And voices like waves upon the shore,
Build a bridge almost complete
Between us
And the World Next Door
The Word made flesh,
When death is done,
We'll take our old clothes off and
We’ll put our new clothes on
Kingdom now, and Kingdom come
Groan for what is kept in store
And draw to a close the work begun
Between us
And the World Next Door
Between us
And the World Next Door
Between us
And the World Next Door…

Voices and instruments: T.S. Taylor
Note:
I no more believe that heaven is “up” (in outer space somewhere), or that hell is “down” under the ground than I believe the relatively popular and sentimental idea, even among Christians who should know better, that when we die we become stars or angels. If, from where I sit now, heaven is up there somewhere in the sky, then for someone in another part of the world, he or she would, in fact, be traveling “downward” (relative to me) in order to reach his or her heavenly destination. My hunch is that the kingdom of heaven is, in fact, a directionless dimension which lies in approximation to our own world, possibly overlapping it in some metaphysical way. C.S. Lewis’s ‘Narnia Chronicles’ made good use of this concept by having Lucy enter Aslan’s domain through an ordinary wardrobe. When people talk about “dying and going to heaven” they either forget, or are somewhat confused by, Christ’s reference to a new heaven and a new earth, or his words to the thief on the cross that the man would, that very day, be with Him in “paradise.” Paradise? Is this another word for heaven? I don’t believe it is. All of this can be a bit confusing and I’m no theologian, but fortunately there are a number of good books on this subject which you can check out for yourself, including NT Wright’s “The Resurrection of the Son of God”, which addresses, among other misconceptions, the confusion many of us have about the afterlife. Wright also explores the nature of Christ’s resurrected physical body (as opposed to some ghost or spirit) as it relates to those of us still living, as well as those who have died and are now in the blissful presence of the Lord but who are waiting anxiously in paradise to be reunited with their new incorruptible bodies and to reign with Christ, not in some distant land up in the sky, but right here on earth. In “The World Next Door” I metaphorically explore, albeit in brief, the truth that with the singular, never before, world-shaking and life-altering event known as the resurrection of Jesus Christ, God’s Kingdom has already entered into our broken world, and though it is not yet in full flourish, we are promised it one day will be.

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